wordless...

decided to write on here more and be more OPEN . . .

it's a hard thing... because, i feel like no one would like to read and know what's going on!

but, i'll jump in with both feet and just share a little here and there.



----- Here i go for now... i have been fighting a battle, a battle of Infertility !
and it's winning... i fight for the breath to share but, can't.
i feel sometimes that it's ruling my life and marriage and it's got a tight hold on us... with tears and anger , depression and hope , love and Loss...

and now most of the time it's too much. too much to handle... too much to deal with...

and lately i start to wonder if it'll be like this forever, just a dream, i figment of my imagination.
-- will i ever be a mother?
-- will i ever see those two lines?
-- will there ever be a flutter in my belly?

right now , i don't know.

but, someone said writing will help...
help ease the mind and soul.

we'll see.
ta ta for now, until next time